Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Prologue

I have finally finished my semifinal draft of Elf Tears! All that's left now is to get the Kickstarter for it up and running so I can have it professionally edited (as well as advertise it and all that jazz). Then I will prepare the final draft and publish it! In celebration, I am sharing the prologue with you all. It still needs edited as it is only first draft quality, so feel free to tell me what does and doesn't work.


Prologue

I can't take it anymore, Phen,” elf princess Éadra told her best friend. The pair stared outside the castle window watching the sun set beyond their forest home.“Our troops are tired, our people are tired, and I'm tired. I'm tired of healing our soldiers day after day, only to see them go out to fight again, or even get killed. A war fought entirely on the defensive can never be won.”
“I'm tired too,” Phen replied, “but how can we ever take the fighting back to Erron if we can't even find his fortress?”
“That's the question, isn't it?” Éadra's voice was bitter. “I'm about ready to explore those mountains myself, see what Erron's hiding in there and how he's keeping us out.”
“Don't even think about it,” Phen said. He took Éadra by the shoulders and looked her in the eyes.
“What?” she said. “You know I wouldn't really.”
“Yes, you would.”
Éadra hung her head. “I just have to do something, Phen.” She fiddled with the diamond that hung on a chain around her neck. “I wonder what mother would have done?”
“She would have put your safety first. Yours and Learé's. That's what she always did. She wouldn't want you risking your life like that.”
“I know, I know.” She paused for a moment, then changed the subject.
“I found something interesting in my chamber the other day,” she said. “I dropped this necklace behind my bed, and when I moved the bed to find it, I discovered a mural of a unicorn.”
A teasing look crossed Phen's face. “You don't think it's hiding a secret passageway, do you?”
Éadra laughed. “Phen, we're not kids anymore. I'm not going to go running through the castle looking for secret tunnels.”
“We wouldn't be running through the castle,” he replied, voice innocent, “just checking a single room.”
“Come on, Phen, why would a mural of a unicorn be hiding a passageway?”
“Why does that diamond have 'Heloth Uniqa' engraved on it?”
Éadra shrugged. “My mother was obsessed with that mountain. She believed there were unicorns still living there on its unreachable peak.”
“And your chambers used to be your mother's. Maybe she knew more than she let on.”
Éadra chuckled. “You're insane.”
“Please?” said Phen. “Humor me?”
“Fine,” said Éadra.
They walked to her room and shoved the bed aside again.
“Good grief,” said Phen as they pushed, “this bed is heavy.”
“It's a big bed, and the canopy doesn't exactly help. Why do you think I'd never moved it before? Come on, one more push and we have it.” They shoved and the bed moved, exposing the larger-than-life rearing unicorn that had been hidden by the canopy.
Phen immediately ran up to the wall and began to study it. “I don't see or feel anything that suggests this is anything other than a wall, but that doesn't mean there isn't something here.”
“Well hurry up; I can't spend all day here.”
“Oh, lighten up, Éadra,” he said with a smile. “That meeting isn't for another few hours.”
“Maybe there's some kind of magic password,” she suggested.
“Maybe,” said Phen. “Now, what could it be?”
“I don't know, there are probably thousands of possible combinations.”
“It's probably something related to unicorns.”
“Like what? Horn? Hoof? Heloth Uniqa?”
The wall opened, and Éadra and Phen stumbled back in surprise.
“You have to be kidding me,” said Éadra.
“Wow. We have to come back later and explore it.” But Éadra was already stepping into the tunnel. She turned back to Phen.
“This could be the answer to everything,” she said.
Phen looked confused. “How?”
“If this leads to Heloth Uniqa, if mother was right and there are unicorns there, maybe they could help us. Unicorns were supposed too be vicious fighters. Who knows? They might even be able to get into Erron's mountains.”
“Now you're just being unrealistic. Besides, if they could help,don't you think your mother would have asked for their help long ago?”
Éadra sighed. “Maybe, but I still have to try.”
“This is the kind of impulsive thing we were just talking about, Éadra.”
Says the one who insisted on checking for a secret passage.”
Phen shook his head. “I was just having fun, I didn't think there was really something here. Look, at least go to the meeting first. Tell your councilors about the tunnel and see what they say.” Something in his voice made Éadra pause.
“I don't know that I want to take this to the council,” she said. “They bicker and debate for months on end sometimes, and our need is urgent. Besides, if I wait, I'm going to talk myself out of this. sIf I'm going to go, I have to go now.”
“Don't you at least want to tell your sister?”
Éadra shook her head. “I don't want to get her hopes up. I'll tell her if it works. Just make up an excuse for me, okay?”
Phen took a deep breath. “Fine,” he said.

Éadra gave him a peck on the cheek. “Thanks Phen. You're the best.” She took off down the tunnel, leaving her friend behind.